Avdi Berisha
The interviewer: Welcome Mr. Avdi. Let’s start the story with when the situation started to worsen.
Avdi Berisha: Well, the situation was tense from long ago, but it only got worse in the ’98-’99 as we got into a war. They made us have a war no matter if we wanted or not, we didn’t have a choice. We tried to prepare ourselves more or less, but we didn’t even have what to get ready for, we didn’t have where to go. Then, our military tried to fight with masks on, they didn’t have good conditions, and they didn’t have clothes or guns or anything. They tried to fight and stayed in the mountains trying to protect the families and tell us what was going on. They tried and tried and got to the point when they got their uniforms, they were a secret at the beginning but then when the number raised they got there in the battle. The Serbian military started going to Skenedarj with the Jasharaj family. They didn’t go much in Llap, they could pass easier, and nobody would stop them. They all went over that part of Kosovo. But then they returned to Llap again with 50-60 armored vehicles – cars, policemen, and military coming in the direction of Pollata and Bajgora. Their plan failed or I don’t know and they returned back that day or the following day to the other part of Kosovo. There’s nothing I can say about Jasharaj. It was all soot around Kosovo but Jasharaj lost 60 family members. Children and elderly ones fought for days, day and night, as long as they could handle all that. The situation then got tense in the whole of Kosovo. Then, I also left my house. I had three houses. I left my stall, the animals, and the storehouse with animals’ food, and everything I had in the village. The military then got settled in my houses. I took my family and went to Prishtina. I paid 120 bucks for a room and we were 44 people in it. I could hardly sleep. I stayed there for a year. They emptied Kosovo by making people leave.
The interviewer: You told me the story how you delivered food to the military. Can you tell that story once more?
Avdi Berisha: We rented a room. My oldest son, Rexhep, delivered food to the military who were staying in our house. He travelled by e small car. They then noticed what my son was doing so he had to stop. So, then me and my wife travelled by bus with two bags of bread. There were too many passengers. We all had to get off the bus when we arrived in Besi. They made the bus return. I stayed there. A man with his wife came and asked us where we were going – I told him that we were going to Lluzhan. He gave us a lift. When we arrived in Lluzhan he told us that he was going in the direction of Orllan. So, we agreed to stop at the village Lluga because we were afraid to take the road to Lluzhan. We got off the car in Lluga. We walked on muddy and snowy roads and arrived at Penuha and then at Burica. We were scared to take other roads. When we got there we saw some tanks. We hid after some bushes until they passed. We hardly managed to give them those two bags of bread; they didn’t have flour or anything. We hardly made it to Prishtina and we could never go back. They ate everything we had in our house, they also slaughtered the animals. We let them use two houses and everything we had there. We only took our duvets – some of us didn’t even take our duvets. Later on, our military had to leave our houses and then the Serbian military stayed there. When we got there back we saw our garages and houses all ruined; also the stalls were ruined. They had hidden their tanks and also messed up the shop I had. UÇK was cast out and then they stayed there. Afterwards, they made us leave Prishtina – they started forcing them out into groups of neighborhoods. They emptied the city. We were in Xhambaz; there were three streets left with inhabitants. They notified us a day ahead that we had to leave. 5-6 or 10 policemen came to our yard. They asked us where we were from and we told them we were from Podujeva. He gave the women and children 5 minutes to leave the house and return to Podujeve and asked us to go with them – my son, Rexhep, a son of my friend, Rexhep, Banush – he was from Mramor and he is still alive, and I. They maltreated us along the way. They put us in line in Xhambaz. The trucks were waiting for us. I objected to that because that was unfair. We left our wives and children and didn’t know what would happen to them. He grabbed me by the throat and told me I’d be executed. I am telling you in Albanian. I told him okay because you couldn’t beg a Serbian. He said *speaking in Serbian… He thought I’d change my mind but I didn’t because there were far better men who were killed, and there was nothing left for me; my sons were close to me there in line. They were all feeling the heat because we were 20-30 people from the neighborhood in line and they wanted to shoot me dead. When he saw that I didn’t change my mind he put his gunshot in my neck. I don’t know if it didn’t work or if God helped me survive but he said *speaks in Serbian – go to hell, go to your spot – he didn’t cuss at me, he only spoke those words. I got in line and they put us in the trucks. We thought they were taking us to the bridges and bombing them. That’s how they did before.
The interviewer: Where did they take you?
Avdi Berisha: We were on a ride for an hour and a half around the city but we didn’t know where. They took us to the neighborhood of Muhaxhere. We were on that ride around the city for a long while but we didn’t see where because the trucks were covered. When we got there, there were 300 people – the basements in the police station were full of people. We had our hands tied. We were forced to tie our hands. They took us there. There were two policemen, one of them was a Serbian and the other was Roma. The Serbian told us that even if my father was here I wouldn’t be able to help him, not even my brother, let alone you. He told us to respond with “I don’t know” whatever they would ask about the inspectors. He said that we should tell them we didn’t know any of them. We had to say “I don’t know”. They brought us two bottles of water. We had a single sip because it was too hot in there because we were scared and sad. They beat up my son Rexhep and broke his ribs – from up to today he still has it as such. They also beat the other 3 people three or four times. Their heads were swollen; they had gotten there a day before. They asked one of them where their family was and he told them that his family was in Albania – so we beat him the most – “you sent your family there and you stopped here to fight with UÇK”, they told him. They then let us go after asking us questions in line. Banush fainted, it was like he experienced a heart attack. They put him in a different room. He was in a really bad condition. They were slapping his face to bring him back, just like the doctors. He had lost consciousness. We splashed some water on his face. I thought they would take him to hospital and I stayed there because he was my friend. I went with him because I tried to help. When he gained consciousness they didn’t take him to the doctor or anything. They then didn’t let us go. It was a room with a lot of blood, some mattresses, and some broken chairs – there was a dark room where they took the ones they wanted to beat hard and secretly.
The interviewer: Did you hear their voices when they got beaten?
Avdi Berisha: No, because they would take them to another room that was far from us. We didn’t hear anything, but even if we did there was nothing to be done. They wanted to execute me and nobody could do anything, not even my sons who were there with me. There were cases when they violently took children from their parents and stabbed them and threw them away. You can’t beg a Serbian. So, they then let us go. They made us leave Kosovo. They told us to go to Macedonia or anywhere. They put us on a bus. We carried my friend in a blanket, we thought he would not survive and we didn’t know where to bury him. When we got on a train in Fushe Kosova they made us pay for the train tickets. I paid for everyone since I had the money. We went to Bllaca and there were some buses. They brought us some water when we got there. We got on buses and they took us to different places. They took us to Qegran. There was a big field in Qegran near the mountain and it had plenty of rocks. They built the tents there. Actually, the tents were built. When I got there I found a stove somewhere in a ditch. I also built a kind of bathroom with some nylon and sticks. They were all impressed. People were staying there for months and weeks and they didn’t know where to shower and cook. I had 14 family members and I found a solution. I made a place to take showers. I had to.
The interviewer: How long did you stay in Qegran?
Avdi Berisha: I only stayed there for 7 days. They offered us to go to Italy so we went there. My son went to Germany. I didn’t want to go abroad. I had said that only my dead body can leave Kosovo but they forced us to, I didn’t have a choice. We left by the last train, we were the last the leave. From there then they took us to England without our will. My daughter-in-law was there and she had to give birth – Çlirim. When we arrived there my wife got sick because of sadness and fear. I stayed for quite a while in the hospital – in Sarsburg – I guess it was 100 kilometers away from Manchester. We then took her to Manchester where she stayed for a month. She had to undergo X-rays on a daily basis. She had undergone surgery but it was unsuccessful. My wife got tired. The director of the hospital was invited to her office one day. When I got there she asked me if I smoked. I told her that I did. She said that I could light a cigarette. I refused to do so because it wasn’t okay to light a cigarette in such an environment. She held my hand and told me to stay strong because my wife didn’t have much time left. She was afraid of my reaction or I don’t know. She told me that she might have another 2 months left to live and that we could take her to Kosovo. She offered to give me the medicine. When we got ready to return to Kosovo they told us that she could only travel alone – one of the daughters was allowed to travel with her. I told them that if it was necessary for me to jump over the airplane I would and I wouldn’t leave my wife alone. They let me go then. We went to Prishtina by plane. My wife died after 2 weeks. They told us that she had 2 more months left, but she died after two weeks.
The interviewer: What was the village like when your returned?
Avdi Berisha: What was it like? I feel sorry we didn’t have a camera to take some pictures. All of the 42-43 houses were burnt down. All of them were burnt, but our houses were burnt a bit more because they had lived there. They had cut all of our trees and ruined everything. They had broken the chainsaw because they couldn’t take it, so the least they could do was break it for us. They had burnt our barn. People told us that that took 1 or 2 months to burn all down because normally the cereals take long to burn. I tried to fix the house a little when I got back. I built two small barns because I thought I’d need them. The grass was so big because it was rainy and the winter was long. I came from England after 6 months. Someone asked me if I could go to Kosovo to see what had happened. When I came there, even the flights were cancelled during that period… it was 26 degrees… no I guess it was 0 degrees. I got there. We were 52-35 people in that hotel and nobody dared to come there because they spread a rumor that whoever goes to Kosovo they won’t be allowed to return. I told them that’s what I was waiting for. I am from Kosovo, if I’d be stuck there it’s my country, not a foreign one. I was the first one to return. When I went then back again I sent them a “flija” (traditional food) – it still feels like my arms are hurting. Mihane had made a big “flija”, a piece for 52 people. I paid 350 bucks for my father’s tobacco. I bought as much as he needed. It was expensive back then, 70 bucks for a box of cigarettes. So, this is how life flies by.
The interviewer: Thank you very much!